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Emily and Adam are two people who understand the particular assignment of Date Lab. In their own ways, they’ve been studying for it. Adam is a big fan of “Married at First Sight,” the reality TV show in which literal strangers are set up to wed upon meeting. Meanwhile, earlier this year, someone sent Emily a Date Lab column, and it ignited an obsession that launched her far into the depths of our archive. And now, having read so many of these accounts, Emily is paying it forward by providing entertainment to Date Lab’s readers. “I feel like I’m giving back to the community,” she told me, laughing. During her post-date interview, she referred to notes she took for accuracy upon arriving home.
Emily and Adam (33 and 32, respectively) entered Quattro Osteria in Shaw already aligned in many ways. They’re both out of long-term relationships that ended about a year ago, give or take. Neither is looking to settle, and they’re both having fun dating. Date Lab did not interrupt fun’s flow for either of them. In short, they showed up with great attitudes and benefited handsomely.
There was not an awkward moment on their nearly six-hour date, which, go figure, kicked off with mutual attraction. Emily thought Adam was “very cute” upon setting eyes on him, referencing his smile and facial hair in particular. As they were being photographed for this article, Adam called Emily a “beautiful woman.” At the time, Emily wasn’t sure whether Adam was just saying that or really meant it. It turns out he did mean it, or at least he was still using those very words to describe her when I spoke to him days later.
They were well lubricated by design after opting to go with a heavy-on-the-drinks distribution of their meal budget, ordering a relatively light dinner mostly consisting of snacks (a burrata salad and charcuterie). They shared a single pasta dish, the pappardelle quattro ragu.
Emily described the conversation as “organic” despite covering several topics in rapid succession. She is a public defender and tends to lead with her abolitionism when describing her work; this helps to weed out potential adversaries to her cause. “I don’t believe in prisons. I am motivated every day by keeping as many people out of the system as I possibly can,” she said with pride.
Adam was impressed with Emily’s career and reasons for it. He is director of public policy for an anti-hunger organization, and wanted to get into that work because he grew up poor. He mentioned early in the date that he went to Harvard for graduate school, something he is extremely proud of after his humble beginnings. “I grew up in a double-wide trailer, I went to community college, and went to a state school,” he told me. Emily said that Adam’s pronounced confidence “didn’t come off as cocky to me at all,” and that it made her feel comfortable. “It makes me nervous when other people are nervous,” she said. In fact, she matched his confidence: Adam described Emily’s presence as “strong.”
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After throwing back three cocktails each (plus some sparkling rosé the owner of Quattro Osteria welcomed them with), sharing a lot of laughs, and engaging in some flirting, they began strategizing about where they should go next. In a conscious effort to set themselves apart from the Date Lab pack, Adam decided he’d get his nose pierced (again) and they commenced calling local tattoo and piercing joints. But every place they tried in the area was already closed by 9:30 p.m. on a Tuesday, around when they were wrapping up. They settled on drinks at the nearby bar Ivy and Coney.
There, instead of sitting across from Emily, Adam elected to sidle up next to her while they drank their Guinnesses. They discussed dating in D.C. The conclusion? Neither of them are thirsty. “Without being self-centered, I think both of us probably don’t have a hard time meeting people. We’re both outgoing, friendly, hot people,” said Emily.
As if to provide an illustration, Adam at one point returned from the bathroom and asked Emily if she’d like to kiss him. She said she would and so they did. “There was tongue,” reported Emily. They hung out a bit longer. No French-and-runs here. Adam finally said, “All right, shall we?” To which Emily replied: “Where are we going?” Home, Emily! It’s 11 p.m. on a Tuesday.
Having swapped spit, it seemed only right to swap numbers. They began texting immediately and, a few days after the date, were already figuring out when they could meet next. Though their piercing dreams were dashed, Emily and Adam ultimately distinguished themselves by simply being extremely into each other. The Date Lab bar has been reset.
They’ve been texting, but haven’t got together again — yet.
Rich Juzwiak is a writer in New York.
Editor’s note: Because of privacy and safety concerns, Date Lab allows participants to be identified only by their first names.
A reminder from the Date Lab team: Our daters volunteer to participate in the column. While we appreciate a lively discussion assessing our matchmaking skills, please follow our community rules and do not comment on someone’s appearance or write a personal attack.
Source link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/magazine/2022/10/27/date-lab-no-french-and-runs-here/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=wp_lifestyle